How to Open the Door to Communication
There are few things like the pure love of a child. Their eyes and gentle faces communicate so clearly. Whether at play or asleep, in sickness or in health, or as we observe them we know that they are truly a gift from God. The complexity of life does not cloud their communication.
GeNelle Miller Montgomery left this world on August 27, 1978 but not before, she changed my life. She was my high school English teacher. She taught me the power of language through writing, exegesis and the love of reading. Her investment in my life continued far beyond the classroom. She was a neighbor, a Sunday School teacher and a friend.
Ms. GeNelle honored me by allowing me to participate in her memorial service. I have tried to honor her with the things she taught me. One of her greatest lessons would later become my greatest compliment. Knowing that my life would center on communication, she shared with me a key that opened the door to effective communication.
Communication only truly occurs when it creates an action. Effective communication creates a positive action that affects the lives of the others. Great communication requires hard work and life experience.
Teachers are a part of God’s divine plan. Book assignments and compositions; Ms. GeNelle designed my assignments to prepare me for my vocation. The “teacher notes” on my papers where funneling me toward a point of effectiveness. The suggestions to be careful in the selection of words and the outlines of how to introduce and expand your subject were all a part of her plan. She knew she was a part of constructing a life that would instruct others and at the right moment, she would give the final lesson.
The phone began to ring with opportunities for am18 year old young man to speak to student groups and quickly followed by invitations to preach in churches. I found my sermons structured like the compositions I wrote in school.
In the early years of speaking, there was single compliment repeated multiple times. I was not sure what it meant.
Then, the telephone call came. Ms. GeNelle had left this world and slipped into the eternity of God. Her dear mother Mrs. Miller told me that Ms. Montgomery had requested that I be a part of her memorial service. We talked for quite a while about her daughter, my teacher, and the things she related about teaching me. Her mother said that I was one of the most sincere people she knew. The right moment had come, the final lesson, the key, now shared.
Sincerity was the compliment I heard repeatedly. I realized the key to effective communication was sincerity. People quickly discern if you are sincere or a hypocrite. When you communicate effectively, people understand if you are seeking what is right and with transparent motives.
The Apostle Peter said to “love one another with a fervent heart” (I Peter 1:22).
Our world is in desperate need of those who are fervent in heart, desiring above all else to influence the lives of others for that which is good and great.
Francois de la Rochefoucauld over 300 years ago said, “What we usually see is only an artful dissimulation, to win the confidence of others”. Communicators, so-called leaders are simply trying to connect, win the confidence of others, and use that moment of attention for their own benefit.
What kind of leader are you? What marks your communication? What causes your heart to beat?
Sincerity is the key that opens the door of communication. Once inside that door lives may be changed. That is why children can communicate without a word.
Next time we look at a leadership key that is quickly disappearing from our world.
Time for a cup of coffee.